BLINDED BY SEX?

LIBRA HOROSCOPE (from astrology.com): You may find that it’s harder than usual for you to get your friends to focus — but that’s not your job, is it? Expect disruptions and little problems to interfere with plans all day long.

Laura’s Log:
“They know you can sue them for harassment, don’t they?”

“I don’t know. I suppose.”

“They need to know you know that’s a possibility.”

“Marella, I just started there. I don’t want to create a stir.”

“Too late for that. You’ve sent one of their up-and-comers on stress leave. Some of the partners might resent you. They need to know you know you were harassed. It’s job security. How ’bout I make a call?”

Sometimes having a sister who was a cutthroat lawyer was a liability. She took a perfectly nice kung po chicken at Wild Rice and made it tasteless.

* * *
Gabriel cancelled our late-night hookup, saying he was tired. Hmm. Only a month in and the promise of hot sex wasn’t enough. I’d only seen him once this week. True, I’d had that assignment from hell at work, but there’s something more going on. If sex is the best part and I’m not getting any, well,…it may be time to have The Talk.

* * *
Tamara met me for brunch this morning at Trattoria Italian Kitchen. Ostensibly she wanted to grill me on the Derrick debacle. A half cup of coffee in and the conversation had moved on.

“So how young do you think is too young?” she asked. Her hands shook as she held her coffee mug. No one gets a caffeine buzz off a half dozen sips. Something told me her question was coming a little late. Like when Mom asked vegetarian Lucy if chicken stock was okay after everyone had finished the homemade pumpkin soup. Oh, Tamara, what have you done?

“Well,…he’s legal, right?”

“Oh, yeah.” She was beaming.

“Does he know Johnny Depp was a TV star?”

“Probably not. And I think that’s something Johnny Depp would like us all to forget.”

“Well, is he done with college?”

“Uh,…not quite.”

And cue coughing fit. The coffee went down the wrong way. So did Tamara’s answer. She seemed delighted to trigger such a reaction. (Yes, dear Tamara. If the Heimlich were necessary I’d have to count on a bus boy to step up. That is, if she wasn’t trying to distract him with her cleavage.)

Once I’d recovered, she leaned forward and whispered, “I know I shouldn’t but…he’s from work.”

“What do you mean ‘from work’?” I asked. “Everyone there is past…” Oh. My. God. Not the intern. Not obnoxious Todd! Unfortunately, there were no other options.

And suddenly I was following up a tasteless dinner with a toughest plate of eggs I’d ever chewed—no fault to the chef.

KEN’S JOURNAL:
ENTERTAINING A TEEN IS EXHAUSTING. I MUST’VE FALLEN ASLEEP ON THE SOFA LAST NITE W/IN 5 MIN OF JERRY PICKING UP TRAVIS. WOKE UP AT 2:30 A.M., THE TV BLARING AS AN OLD LADY DID SPINS IN A WHEELCHAIR ON A CARPET. THE STUNTS GET LO-TECH ON LATE NITE.

MARTY & I HAD FOUR UNITS TO SEE THIS MORNING. NEVER GOT THE SENSE MARTY WAS INTO IT. HIS CELL KEPT RINGING EVERY COUPLE MINUTES. NOT CLIENTS. AT LEAST, I HOPE NOT CLIENTS. IF HE MADE A HABIT OF SAYING “I CAN’T WAIT TO DO YOU DOGGY AGAIN” TO CLIENTS, OUR NEW VENTURE WAS DOOMED. OR…MAYBE IT WOULD BE JUST THE THING TO GIVE US A NICHE.

STELLA WAS HER NAME. HE PICKED HER UP AT AuBAR LAST NITE. MUST’VE BEEN SOME NITE. MARTY WASN’T KNOWN FOR GIVING OUT HIS NUMBER. NOT THE CORRECT ONE ANYWAY.

“STELLA?! OLD SOUNDING NAME,” I SAID, TRYING TO COVER UP AN IRRITATING STRAIN OF JEALOUSY.

“NOTHIN’ OLD FASHIONED ABOUT HER!” HE GRINNED. “SHE’S A FREAK! WE DID STUFF THAT WON’T BE LEGAL FOR ANOTHER CENTURY. IF EVER.”

AND THEN HE GOT BACK TO BUSINESS. THANK GOD MARTY WAS A PROFESSIONAL. “SO DO YOU LIKE THIS DUMP OR CAN WE CALL IT A DAY? STELLA WANTS TO GO AGAIN & GOTTA SAY I GOTTA GO.”

YEAH, THE CONDO WE WERE LOOKING AT WAS A DUMP. BUT THAT WASN’T THE POINT. NOT THAT MY OPINION MATTERED. STELLA HAD STOLEN MARTY’S HEART.

WELL, NOT HIS HEART.