WITH FRIENDS (& FAMILY) LIKE THIS…

LIBRA HOROSCOPE (from astrology.com): You are spending extra time with your people today — or trying to, at least! Your social needs are pretty strong right now, so you need to make sure that you’re making your desires known.

Laura’s Log:
I’m not generally a spontaneous person so when I make a sudden shopping excursion south of the border and stay overnight, it creates havoc with my Vancouver existence. Mom guilted me pretty hard when I picked up Tupper last night. I’d bought her a lovely pair of hand-blown glass mugs which she accepted by saying, “Hmm. Now isn’t that an odd color. What shade would you say it is dear? A perfect match for lime Jell-O? Well, if I ever serve Jell-O, these will be perfect.”

And she topped that by handing me a bag of Tupperware containers. “Since you missed brunch, I had strawberry rhubarb muffins left over. Strawberries really don’t keep so I had to use them all up. You know how your father isn’t one for berries. Loves his melons though. And I’ve thrown in an omelet you can heat up for breakfast tomorrow. You’re so thin. I swear you only eat when you’re over here.”

Somehow I managed to escape to the car. It helped that Tupper threw up in the hallway. Normally, I would’ve grilled Mom about what “treats” she fed him, but I just wanted to go. Didn’t feel the least bit badly when she said, “Never mind that. I’ll clean it up.” It’s called doggy justice. You feed an old Shih-Tzu on a specialized diet half a quiche, he’s going to give it right back to you.

Nadia was next with the how-could-you-go-on-a-shopping-weekend-with-HER spiel. No excuse but I was caught off guard and lashed back with, “Sorry, but I’d had my fill of Bradley over drinks on Friday.” And, just like that, she hung up.

I didn’t get a chance to call Nadia back to make amends because the calls kept coming. Next came Lucy, followed by Estelle. Both were peeved that I was an unannounced no-show for brunch. Without a mediator, it was a disaster. Lucy and Carl(a) stormed out after ten minutes. (That explains why there were so many extra muffins.)

I didn’t have to deal with Tamara until this morning. She stopped by my desk early with a drive-by snipe: “Gosh, that was so much fun yesterday.” Whatever.

I guess there is some truth to the expression absence makes the heart grow fonder. Some truth. The problem is that everyone is expressing their fondness through anger.

KEN’S JOURNAL (via BlackBerry):
HAD TO CALL MARTY OVER TO THE NEW OFFICE FIRST THING THIS MORNING. CARL & I WERE AT LOGGERHEADS OVER THE BATHROOM INSTALLATION. THE TILE WAS ALL WRONG AND I WANTED IT RIPPED OUT. THE ONLY THING CARL WANTED TO RIP WAS MY FACE OFF. MARTY SAUNTERED IN, ALL SCHMOOZY, AND SMOOTHED THINGS OVER. YES, CARL WOULD TAKE OUT THE TILE. BUT I WOULD HAVE TO LEAVE. FINE. I’DA FIRED CARL BUT S/HE WAS LASHING OUT, ACCUSING ME OF HATING LESBIANS. WTF?!

SARA & I WENT FOR LUNCH. ANOTHER BAD WEEKEND FOR HER. JERRY & TRAVIS WENT AT IT AND BOTH ETHAN & BELLA STARTED GETTING TEARY, ASKING WHY DADDY HATES TRAVIS AND WHY TRAVIS IS YELLING AT EVERYONE. BELLA, IN FACT, HOLED UP IN HER ROOM AND PULLED OUT HER OLD DOLLS. AS SARA EAVESDROPPED FROM THE HALL, SHE HEARD BELLA YELLING AT THE DOLLS. “IF YOU GIRLS DON’T BEHAVE, YOU CAN’T BE IN THE FAMILY NO MORE.” HEARTBREAKING.

AS I SAT ACROSS AND LISTENED, I COULDN’T HELP BUT FEEL SARA HAD SUDDENLY AGED. ONLY 39, BUT LOOKED 50 ALL OF A SUDDEN. I WISH I HAD SOME ANSWERS OR AT LEAST A LITTLE MORE COMFORT FOR HER. IN TRUTH, SHE JUST SEEMED RELIEVED TO HAVE MY EAR FOR AWHILE.

’NUCKS TONITE. MARTY WANTS TO HIT ONE OF THE BARS IN YALETOWN. I LOVE THE PLAYOFF ATMOSPHERE, BUT DON’T KNOW IF I CAN HANDLE A LOSS IN A CROWD. A WIN? NO PROBLEM.